Thursday, July 29, 2010

Vanish

Here is a play I wrote a few years ago that I thought I would share. :)

VANISH

CHARACTERS:

Ainsley: Early to mid twenties and 9 years old. A somewhat quirky and jaded girl. She no longer has an imagination and feels like she had to grow up a little too fast.

April: Early to mid twenties and 9 years old. Strong, tall, calm and confident. Intimidating, but incredibly sweet. She always has your back.

These actresses should not be dressed down for age. Rather it should be performed by actresses in their twenties and they should look like they are in their twenties.

One late evening in December. Ainsley sits alone on a stairwell. Ainsley speaks to the audience.

AINSLEY

I suppose at some point in our lives we all have wished to be a superhero or to have some sort of a magical power. Maybe it’s because we want to be unique. Or maybe it would be a great way to escape the lives that have been given to us by some unknown force in the sky. Or maybe it’s because you want to change the world. Me, I wanted to uniquely escape. It worked every time until one day, when my magic became its own disappearing act, and simply vanished into thin air. Everything about that day is fresh in my mind. The day you lose hope? The day you realize magic isn’t real? That is a day you never forget.

The sky was painted with sponged clouds and the air was dry without a breeze. The faded green apartment complex that my parents called “home” seemed frozen in the universe, as if it were isolated from the entire world. No cars pulled out of their assigned parking spaces, and no residents exited their homes. I sat alone outside on the gravel-like stairwell leading up to the lesbian lovers’ apartment, which, unfortunately, was immediately above ours. Unfortunate not because they were lesbians, but unfortunate for a 9-year-old to have to hear rowdy lesbian sex when she is trying to a fall asleep on a school night. Sitting alone was something I did quite frequently. After relocating yet again to a new elementary school, I had become semi-pro at not making friends. I was awkward and quiet and theatrical… to myself. I survived. In my eyes, friends meant attachments. Attachments meant the moment I became close with them, the moment I would be told by the parental units that we had to pack up everything we owned (which wasn’t very much) and move. Attachments meant judgments. Loneliness was my friend. My imagination was my best friend. My magical powers saved me from everything. They were my unique escape.

And then April came along.

I tried so very hard not to be friends with her. She was a lot bigger than I was… towering over me in height and doubling my weight as well. At the tetherball court, she dominated. Little boys ran in fear from her and she laughed. She jabbed her industrial-strength fist into the air after every annihilation.

Pound. Swish. Pound. Swish. Pound pound pound swish swish swish! April the third grader: One.

Pound. Swish. Pound. Swish. Pound pound pound swish swish swish! April the third grader: Two.

Pound. Swish. Pound. Swish. Pound pound pound swish swish swish! April the third grader: Three.

I watched her closely on the playground before I even dared to step in.

I walked the walk.

I told her straight away that she was going to kick my ass (in third grade vocabulary) and she told me I was probably right. I was a half-pint, scrawny, competitive pain in the ass who believed that I could win- that I could beat the unstoppable April Chaffin.

I served.

The shot hit directly towards her powerful right fist.

The ball shot back at my freckled face, but I blocked a bloody-nose with a wimpy left-handed whimper.

She hit it harder, over my head.

Swoosh.

She hit it even harder.

Swoosh.

It was the end at that moment.

Pound. Swish. Pound. Swish. Pound pound pound swish swish swish! April the third grader: The Dominator.

My ass was handed to me on a chocolate colored cafeteria lunch tray.

She had magical powers.

It is summer and a younger Ainsley and her friend April sit on the very same stairwell that Ainsley sat on in the first scene. The two are fidgety and slightly bored.

AINSLEY

I just made the clouds move.

APRIL

If you made the clouds move, than I’m famous. The clouds can’t move with your mind. There’s no way they could move.

AINSLEY

So explain how the clouds just moved! I wished for the clouds to move and the clouds moved!

APRIL

It’s called a breeze.

AINSLEY

There isn’t a breeze.

APRIL

You didn’t make the dumb clouds move!

AINSLEY

If I want the clouds to move… they’ll move.

Again the lights fade out and the scene changes. The girls are standing on opposite sides of the stage. Ainsley is clearly distressed.

APRIL

We’re all packed.

AINSLEY

Don’t be a big fat liar. You can’t move. I’m the one that moves and we’re not moving. And you’re not moving.

APRIL

I’m moving.

AINSLEY

But you can’t move! You’re my only friend, what am I going to do? Who’s going to beat me at everything? Who’s going to even want to be around me?

APRIL

I know and you’re my best friend but…

AINSLEY

But what? Let’s figure something out! What do we do? What are we going to do? We could… I don’t know, hide the keys to the truck? We could… we… we’re the only ones… we’re the only ones who could fix this!

APRIL

I don’t know. We can’t fix anything. It’s done. We’re packed and I’m moving and I came to say goodbye. I have to go back home for dinner.

AINSLEY

What do you mean you have to eat dinner? You’re leaving me now? We have some serious planning we need to do. We have to devise a plan! An escape! Maybe you could just stay with us…

APRIL

I can’t devise a plan and I can’t stay. I’m sorry.

AINSLEY

Okay, I’m making the time stop and we’re going to be friends forever and you’re not leaving because I’m going to make the time stop. You’re my only friend, so I’m stopping time and you’re not going to move. And we can just hang out here on the stairs and throw acorns.

APRIL

You can’t make the time stop.

AINSLEY

I have magical powers. I can make things happen! I can keep you here if I just close my eyes and wish it!

APRIL

No you can’t! You can’t change this. I have to go…

Ainsley watches as April leaves. A beat after April leaves.

AINSLEY

Bye.

Ainsley looks out to the audience and turns her back to move back to the stairs. She looks up at the clouds. After a moment of silence, Ainsley speaks to the audience again.

AINSLEY

She treaded in her converse sneakers across the evenly mowed grass, past the electric box and away to her apartment on the other side of the universe. My best and only friend had left me, alone on the stairwell in front of this complex. Cars sped out of their spots, trees rattled in the wind. My great escape became a great disappointment. My best friend became a memory. My magical powers disappeared.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Dear Person in the Sky,

It's me, Anna. I know we haven't talked much because I don't feel very acquainted to you, but I would like to just get all of the formalities out of the way. I'm Anna. I'm sure you've seen me from afar making my mistakes and living through happiness and through sadness, and letting me live how I want to. But now I need some help because I can't seem to let go of the dislike I have for myself. It's gotten to the point now where the only thing I want is to be free of self-loathing. To let myself truly feel happiness and sadness without judging myself. Without thinking I'm weak. To live life where I have something I deserve and truly believe I deserve it. I want to have the confidence in myself that other people believe I already have. I just want to stop living in fear. And I don't know how to.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Loving her.

Meet Erin McCarley. Listen to everything she has done because everything is amazing.


Too funny!


“Only time can heal your broken heart, just as only time can heal his broken arms and legs.”
—Miss Piggy

Saturday, July 24, 2010

Wake Up by Curtis Peoples

Courage gets hard to fight

With her the heart aches twice,

just too young to be safe.

Push her away tonight

what are you trying to fight?

She’s just the best thing you’ve had.

It’s time for you to stand up

no time for you to run

nothing will hurt as bad as

losing the right one.

Wake up, this is a chance for love.

Wake up, my friend.

Wake up, this is the chance for love.

Wake up, my friend. Ohh ohh. Uh oh ohh.

Wouldn’t turn yourself around

Keep your emotions down

This cant be fixed by you alone.

Hard as it is to hear,

The only thing that’s clear,

Know what you’ve got before its gone.

It’s time for you to stand up

No time for you to run

nothing will hurt as bad as

losing the right one

Wake up, this is a chance for love.

Wake up, my friend.

Wake up, this is the chance for love.

Wake up, my friend.

Its time to make up your mind, this time youre on your own nothing will hurt as bad as losing the right one.

Wake up.

Wake up.

Wake up, this is a chance for love

Wake up, my friend.

Wake up, this is a chance for love

Wake up, my friend.

Wake up this is a chance for love

Wake up, my friend.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

The Hardest Part

"The Hardest Part"

And the hardest part
Was letting go, not taking part
Was the hardest part

And the strangest thing
Was waiting for that bell to ring
It was the strangest start

I could feel it go down
Bittersweet, I could taste in my mouth
Silver lining the cloud
Oh and I
I wish that I could work it out

And the hardest part
Was letting go, not taking part
You really broke my heart

And I tried to sing
But I couldn’t think of anything
And that was the hardest part

I could feel it go down
You left the sweetest taste in my mouth
You're a silver lining the clouds
Oh and I
Oh and I
I wonder what it’s all about
I wonder what it’s all about

Everything I know is wrong
Everything I do, it's just comes undone
And everything is torn apart

Oh and it’s the hardest part
That’s the hardest part
Yeah that’s the hardest part
That’s the hardest part

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Ouch.

Another bit of my heart has broken. I'm not going to have much heart left to give the next one. I hope some sort of magic happens and mends these wounds but right now, I'm feeling like it's not worth it. You give and you give and this is what happens? I can't be so generous anymore. I can't deliver chance after chance, and give and give for someone to not put in anything and walk away practically unscathed. Yes, I took a risk and yes, one can't live a life without trying for love, but this heartbreak just doesn't feel like it's worth it. Nothing hurts more than what I'm feeling right now. And I just don't know when I'll be willing to try as hard as I tried for this one.